Tuesday, March 24, 2009
When my grandson was faced with a new dad, new home in a new state, a new school with a new teacher and new classmates, and a new baby sister, it all spilled over into behaviors. He's always been very inquisitive, intelligent, and active. At times he can be a challenge, for his teachers and parents alike. He would spend a lot of time in trouble both at home and school. It seemed he would be grounded his whole life. When they lived close by, Gubba and Papa would rescue him, relieving his parents for awhile. He spent many weekends with us as his haven, a place to take a breath, a time out. We would love him and spoil him, then send him back home. Now that he is so far from us, he is without that escape. My daughter and I had many discussions when the behaviors started at the new school. We realized in addition to all the new additions in his life, he had experienced some loss as well. The loss of all those same things that were familiar and comfortable to him here in Arizona. We decided to reconnect him with his Gubba and Papa. We scheduled a phone date. Every weekend we make a call to New York, or they call us in Arizona. The call is just for him. I chat during the week with my daughter. We catch up. His voice always sounds melancholy, and he is always reluctant to say goodbye-blowing lots of kisses and waiting to be the last to hang up. We catch up on the latest hockey news, school happenings, grades, and friends. We encourage him, love and hug him with our voices. I like to think it's that extra dose of medicine that helps him feel better until the next time we call.